Happy Festivus Greeting Card
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A Festivus for the Rest of Us.
Stop crying and fight your father. The Happy Festivus Card is the ultimate holiday greeting for those who find tinsel distracting. Featuring the unadorned aluminum pole, this card celebrates the non-commercial holiday that allows you to tell people how much they have disappointed you over the past year.
It requires no decoration, it has a very high strength-to-weight ratio, and it is the perfect way to opt out of the commercial machine (by buying a card). Let the Airing of Grievances begin.
Why You Need It:
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The Pole: It celebrates the sheer simplicity of an aluminum pole. No tinsel, no fuss.
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Cult Classic: Instantly recognized by any fan of the show. It’s a smart, funny alternative to a generic snowman card.
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Premium Quality: Printed on heavy luster cardstock that can withstand even the most vigorous Feats of Strength.
Specs:
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Size: 5x7 Inches (Standard A7)
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Material: Heavyweight Luster Cardstock
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Interior: Blank (List your grievances here)
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Includes: Matching Envelope
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How long does it take to process an order?
How long does it take to process an order?
Orders are typically processed within 1–2 business days.
Do you ship internationally?
Do you ship internationally?
Yes, we offer international shipping to most countries.
What is your return policy?
What is your return policy?
We accept returns within 30 days of delivery.

